Make me know the way I should walk: to You I lift up my soul.
Teach me to do Your Will, for You, O Lord, are my God.
Let Your good Spirit guide me in ways that are level and smooth.
Psalm 143: 8, 10
Wednesday night I did something that will surprise most of the people who know me. I sent a letter to our Parish telling them that I am quitting my work with the altar linens.
If you read my earlier post about the altar linens, you know how much this work means to me. It has become a very special part of my relationship with Jesus, especially during the months I can’t go to Mass.
So why am I quitting? I am quitting simply because I believe it is God’s Will.
Several months ago the strangest thing happened. I was suddenly filled with the sense that my time working with the linens was going to end soon. I needed to get things ready to hand over to someone else. There were no visions, no “words from God”. Just this quiet and peaceful SOMETHING that wouldn’t go away.
Over the next few months I kept praying that God would show me His will. I asked others to pray, too. All along, this quiet SOMETHING never went away. In fact it only became stronger and stronger.
I wrote the letter to the Church a few weeks ago, but didn’t send it. Over and over I kept telling God, “If you don’t want me to send this, let me know!” Instead, I felt more and more certain that I am supposed to quit, so I sent it.
There is one more funny bit to this story. You see, God kind of tricked me when He gave me this job almost five years ago. All my life I have hated ironing. I avoided it like the plague. But when I read that request for help in the church bulletin, God zapped me with something. Seriously! Suddenly I wanted to wash and iron those altar linens so badly! I even had to keep praying “Not my will but Yours be done,” because I was worried there would be too many volunteers and I would miss my chance.
Turns out I was the only one who called. Most Parishes our size have groups of people who take turns doing the altar linens, but we have trouble getting people to volunteer for things. In our Parish, I AM the group.
I told the Church I would keep working until a replacement has been found. I figure that would be the final confirmation that God really does want me to stop. I could be doing the linens for a long time, or maybe God’s planning to zap somebody again? Who knows? It’s in His hands now. I like it that way.
I need to go and iron some altar linens for Jesus. Chirp, Chirp!